Why the sound works in therapy but not at home yet
A short explanation for parents
Your child can make the sound. You have heard them do it. And then at dinner it is gone again, and it is hard not to wonder whether any of this is working.
It is working. What you are seeing is the normal order things happen in, and knowing the order makes the wait much easier.
Making a sound and using a sound are two different jobs
In a session, everything is set up to help: your child knows which sound is coming, there is a picture in front of them, someone pauses at exactly the right moment, and there is nothing else to think about.
In a real conversation, none of that is true. Your child is choosing words, remembering what they wanted to say, competing with a sibling and thinking about biscuits. The sound is one job among many, and the others come first.
So a new sound almost always appears in this order:
- In a session, with help
- In a session, on their own
- At home, when someone asks them to say it
- At home, in a word they were saying anyway
- Everywhere, without anyone noticing it happened
Step four is the one that takes longest, and it is the one that matters. It usually arrives weeks after step two, and it often arrives quietly — you notice a fortnight later that it has been there a while.
What actually helps
- Say the word back, correctly, and carry on. They say “wabbit”; you say “yes, a rabbit!” and keep going. They hear the target without being asked to perform.
- Use the sound more yourself. If it is /s/, find excuses for /s/ words. Hearing it often matters more than practising it hard.
- Wait longer than feels comfortable. Ask something, then count to five silently. Most of us fill the gap in under two seconds, and the gap is where their turn goes.
- Keep practice short and frequent. Ten minutes most days beats an hour on Sunday. This is how motor patterns settle.
What does not help
- Correcting them. “No — say it properly” reliably produces fewer attempts, not clearer ones. A child who gets corrected learns that talking invites criticism.
- Testing them. “Say rabbit. Say it again. Say it for Grandma.” A performance is not practice, and it makes the sound feel like a trap.
- Practising for longer when it is not going well. If ten minutes is a struggle, twenty is worse. Stop while they still want more.
What progress looks like
Not “they say it right now”. Look for:
- More attempts, even unclear ones
- Longer attempts — “ba” becoming “buh-ka” is progress
- Trying the sound in a new word nobody taught them
- Correcting themselves, without you saying anything
Any of those means it is moving, even if it still does not sound right. The clarity comes last.
Questions about your child specifically belong with your speech-language pathologist — they know the plan and this sheet does not. Free to copy and share.